Teens are particularly vulnerable to anxiety following a traumatic event.

While they have their own ways of dealing with trauma, their behaviour may often not reflect their distress. Teens often mask their fears with aggression or a “don’t care about anything” attitude. Parents and other adults may underestimate or overestimate teenager’s needs, or find them unwilling to accept help.

Teenagers can think logically, but also have unstable emotions and may not know how to apply their thinking to real situations. They have to be helped with this and need a balance of both support and independence.

Teenagers often do not have the words to express important feelings, so they handle painful events or emotions by distracting themselves.

They may be so immersed in their own feelings that they don’t recognise adults have their own reactions. They may focus on their own point of view and lack a full understanding of a trauma. They often feel threatened when adults try to be logical with painful experiences. They may not understand what is said until later, and their behaviour often shows they have taken notice even when they don’t acknowledge it. It is important to allow time for them to work things out.

The following responses are all signs of the stress of coming to terms with trauma.
Excessive concern for others, guilt, anxiety and insecurity;
Sleeplessness or wanting to sleep all the time;
Withdrawal from family. spending time alone listening to music or watching TV;
Bored, listless, dissatisfied;
Unable to cope with responsibilities or duties, reverting to immature or irresponsible behaviour;
Preoccupation with the trauma, wanting to talk about it all the time - or angrily refusing to talk about it;
More detached from life, the future or interests;
Wants to do everything now, impatient, intolerant;
Pessimism, loss of interest in the future, cynicism, changed values and philosophy of life;
Poor concentration, memory. organization and p1annig skills; reduced school performance;
Restless needing to be doing something or be with peers all the time;
Exaggerated emotional reactions to small problems;
Angry, controlling, assertive and demanding.

HOW TO HELP TROUBLED TEENAGERS

Encourage them to express emotions and put thoughts into words - if not  with you, make sure they talk to someone. Expressing strong emotions is a natural help in coming to terms with trauma. Suppressed emotions cause long term problems.

Keep communicating, ask the teenager what they are thinking if they won’t talk about emotions. Let them know about your reactions, explain about stress and recovery.

Reassure them about the future, especially that their current distress will pass in time. Make plans to reduce pressure at school or in other activities if they are having trouble coping. Support them to continue their social and recreational activities. Maintain routine and familiar activities, ensure life is secure and predictable. Keep change to a minimum. Don’t make this the time to have disputes about normal problems such as work, chores or defiance.

The best gift you can offer teenagers is patience and understanding.

Top Tip To Do Today for Teens

Have a lot of food around - one minute your teen can’t eat - next they will be ravenously hungry. Pizza out of the blue or midafternoon cookies can help a lot.